Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
It’s best to shoot someone with their own gun so it cannot get traced back to you. If your victim doesn’t have a gun, buy him one. ֎ Don’t burn off your fingerprints with acid, because the police will be looking for someone who burned off his fingerprints with acid and there aren’t very many […]
Read More How to Get Away with MurderIn dark times such as these, we need a hero… a savior… a man with CRAB CLAWS FOR HANDS. ֍ It would be nice to see the word “carapace” in newspapers again… actually, it would just be nice to see newspapers again. ֍ Maryland needs a super hero to call their own besides John Waters… […]
Read More Why We Need Crabman® More than EverThere was a long pause between Kossov’s knocking and the head butler answering the door. He didn’t seem surprised to see the Russian doctor. “Yes sir”, he said as he opened the door. “Is the head housekeeper in?”, Kossov asked. “I’m afraid she isn’t. You see, it’s nearly ten o’clock and from 9-12 she stands […]
Read More My Mystery, Cha ElevenFinger-less hands held a red pencil over the blueprint of Hamshock Manor. A harsh voice spoke into a digital recorder: The entry points will be here and here. Two teams will take out the guards and two more teams will take out the teams that take out the guards. Those teams will rendezvous here. Finger-less […]
Read More My Mystery, Cha TenDid Republicans miss the point? You decide! Any officer standing on a suspect’s neck more than five minutes must be prosecuted for loitering. For the purpose of this bill, “tickling” is any action using the fingers, hands, feather or firearm to induce laughter or death. Any officer who shoots a fleeing suspect in the […]
Read More Excerpts from the New Republican Police Reform Bill
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 