Ten Really Bad Geometry Jokes

Two lines rob a bank and make a clean get away. Line A says to Line B, “The heats on us. We need to be parallel so that no one knows we’re together”

Line B says, “Okay, but don’t you cross me!”

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A hexagon walks into a bar during happy hour and orders a drink. The bartender brings back the drink and a little plate with two fried angles. One is thirty degrees and one if sixty degrees… and, to the hexagon’s surprise, they were delicious. He eats them both, downs his drink and asks for the bill. The bartender bills him for the drink only. The hexagon asks, “What about the angles I ate?”

Bartender replies, “The first two angles are complementary”

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I saw a movie about the invention of calculus and I found it a little derivative…

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Two young hyperbolas were on a trip in the back seat of their parent’s station wagon. Suddenly, the sister hyperbola cried out, “Mom! Kevin keeps getting asymptotically close to me”

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The octagon smiles at the new mother triangle. “Aw”, he said, “She’s so sweet. How big is she?”

“Not quite ninety degrees”

“Well, that’s acute angle”

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Noah was bored and wanted to run his boat in a wide circle, but it was never able to finish one. He complained to his son Japheth about it but Japheth replied, “Of course it can’t move in a complete circle, dad… it’s an ark”

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“Now we’ll divide the opposite angle by the adjacent angle… are you still with me, Bobby?”

“I was until you went off on that tangent”

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The auditor threw down his pencil and complained, “All your company does is calculate the number of cubic inches in irregular solids and you charge almost nothing. How do you make any money?”

“Volume”

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James Bond was baffled. “I don’t understand why you did ANY of this”

“Well, Mr. Bond. It might help to know that I’m π/6 radians”

“Oh!”, exclaimed the secret agent, “So THAT’S your angle”

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“This is very well-written… except for your character, Dot. She’s kind of one dimensional”