Really Bad First Words

The Untold Truth Of Fatal Attraction

[Sometimes, the first words you hear from someone are an indicator of what they horrors they will bring to your life so PAY ATTENTION]

I knew you were okay because I can see your aura”

Hi, great to meet you. If you want a man who’s intelligent, has a good sense of humor and is a giving caring lover, I’m two of those things!”

You look like my kind of guy… the kind who dates me a few times until I do something creepy and dumps me forcing me to wait outside his home and work until someone accuses me of boiling a pet bunny rabbit and puts me in a state sanitarium. Wanna sit at a table or the bar?”

I’m your neighbor. I watch a lot of horror movies so, if you hear screaming or pleading or scratching on the walls, it is definitely a movie and not a lawyer being killed and dismembered. Come over some time and we’ll have a drink”

I write poetry… mostly about clouds”

Hello! I’m little Billy’s mom; and, we should get along GREAT as long as you recognize the fact that my son can do no wrong”

I’m Kevin and I’ll be your waiter. Just to let you know, I am extremely ethical so we won’t be ordering any meat today, will we?”

Nice to meet you. You’re not a process server are you?”

I know it’s tough starting a new job; but, the only thing you have to remember is that I’m a diagnosed manic-depressive so I take no responsibility for how I treat you”

Hi! You seem like a smart guy. I’ll bet you’d really like to know what selling Amway can do for you”

15 thoughts on “Really Bad First Words

      1. Ok, I’m going to buy that one cos I had good news today. Now I’m going to email you something I drew and I want an honest opinion C

        Liked by 1 person

      1. I took poetic license with the first five words. Actually, I write SATIRE about ONE clod (Donnie John Trump).
        As for the rest, you’re welcome to it. I feel about that rhyme like Groucho Marx felt when he said something about having the brain of a four year old….”and was he glad to get rid of it!”


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s