I want to learn to speak Canadian.
I want to learn about my ancestors from census documents, church records and tax documents. If I find one that is famous, I want to weave that into every conversation I have for the rest of my life.
I want to simulate hiking the Appalachian Trail by pacing my living room 550 billion times.
I want to shoot a faith healer in the knee-cap and time how long it takes him to get better.
I want to learn a musical instrument because nothing makes people happier than hearing the words, “I brought my harmonica”
I want to read the Iliad in the original Spanish.
I want to become a cartographer because one day a cartographer might do something heroic and airlines might let ALL cartographers pre-board and I want a piece of that.
I want to win a fight with a volcano.
I want to have a monogamous relationship with two women at the same time.
I want to run for municipal office, get caught in a motel room with a prostitute, Vladimir Putin, a low-yield nuclear device and a briefcase full of cash… and have it all be just a big misunderstanding…
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
I tried to read War and Peace in Russian when I was 16
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How far did you get, Deb?
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About half way … then I got real confused.
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Well… I’m impressed!
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I think you should play the harmonica while pacing the living room 550 billion times. Surely there’s a Guinness World Record for that just waiting to be broken…
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That’ll be easier than trying to eat the most hotdogs…
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Laughed out loud at “I want to learn a musical instrument because nothing makes people happier than hearing the words, “I brought my harmonica”” 🙂
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I tried learning the piano, but there seems to be more to it than just hitting the right keys…
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You could always have a relationship with a woman that has a split personality.
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That would be all the women I’ve had relationships with…
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You bring your harmonica and I’ll bring my banjo.
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You play the banjo? Strum or pick? I’ve heard some great sounds out of metal banjos…
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You’ll need to build a climbing wall and install a snow machine to simulate the White Mountains .
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That’s what the spare bedroom is for…
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That last one sounds like the punchline for a joke…
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No, here’s a joke, Chelsea:
A woman goes to a psychiatrist and says, “I’m worried about my husband. He calls me a “big dummy” all of the time and when I call him on it, he fakes a heart attack. Is he crazy?”
The doctor replies, “Crazy… like a Foxx”
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I think ya lost me.
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I think all the other goals besides tracing the ancestors are frivolous to pursue, you might inherit a fortune once you find out and then write these posts from your yacht in the Mediterranean sea.
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The ancestors I know of were pioneers, American Indians and German immigrants. I think the yacht will have to wait…
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Oh so you have ticked it off, music then? Btw does US have inheritance tax
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It used to kick in at around five million dollars. Who knows if they still have it… I think Republicans repealed it.
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If the last one will ever going to happen – let me know, I’ll help with briefcase 💼 lol
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I was hoping you’d help with the uranium, Ray…
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Haha 😆
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So, the last two would, presumably, be mutually exclusive? Or would the prostitute be one of your two simultaneous monogamous relationships?
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The prostitute might be BOTH of my two simultaneous monogamous relationships…
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Oooo, deep–adds an intriguing psychological layer. We’re talking life-as-performance art!
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