[I’m kind of burned out… and I’ve added another hundred followers. Normally, this would mean another installment of The Moosehead Stratagem; however, that will be difficult because it hasn’t been created yet. I’ve got a collection of columns I was trying to peddle years ago and next week will be entirely those.
So, this is kind of a separation, albeit a brief one. I think that we can get through this if we stick with the following rules of behavior:]
You can see other humor sites… if you promise not to get emotionally involved with them.
And, to be fair, I won’t greedily solicit praise from anyone new while we’re apart.
As far as possessions go, please return my subtle irony and biting wit; you can KEEP the puns.
I’ll return your poetry, essays and any furniture that your aunt gave us.
Remember that this separation is NOT your fault. I just need some time to work things out… things such as why you’ve destroyed our great relationship with your nonsense.
I firmly believe we can separate like two mature adults and if you unfollow me I will die.
I’ll be back to writing new stuff in a week. Until then, enjoy some unpublished, “This Day in History” columns that were once turned down by more newspapers than currently exist.
The very fact that this post is written as a list is a great indicator as to why I need a week off.
I’ll still be reading your blogs because Deb craves attention, Chelsea might fall into some weird pregnancy-related psychosis and Mister Muse… well, what can I say about him that hasn’t already been said under oath in court?
Thank you all, sincerely, for another hundred follows. Please let me know how you like next week’s pieces…