A Random Thought is Often Sought

Related image

Frozen solid and hit with a hammer, he died a broken man…

Related image

If you have an harmonica, you are never truly alone… until you start playing it…

Related image

Do what you like to me; but, I won’t put up with ANYONE hurting my children unless they have a fairly reasonable explanation for doing so…

Related image

Brevity is the soul of wit; but, if you can drone on for forty-five minutes about your colon surgery, you just might get the whole couch to yourself…

Related image

I got a patent on urination so everyone in the world has to ask me before they can urinate. I don’t want money. I just want them to raise their hands and wait for permission.

Related image

I’ve sorted my friends by color so I’ll know which tie to wear when they visit.

Related image

Viagra is a miracle drug. It started as an angina medication which had a side-effect of a powerful and lengthy erection; later, it became an erectile dysfunction drug which had the side-effect of treating angina.

Related image

To stop trafficking in feathers and other body parts, the U. S. Government has a National Eagle Repository, for storing the bodies of American Eagles. We also have a National Cow Repository, but that’s just a butcher shop.

Related image

If you find lipstick on your husband’s collar, it may not be an indicator of an affair; he might just know some woman who really loves shirt collars…

Related image

What’s the difference between an apothecary and an actuary? An apothecary mixes chemicals to help you live longer and an actuary can give you odds on how well he’ll do at it…

Related image

 

24 thoughts on “A Random Thought is Often Sought

      1. You are always clever, Deb.

        Hey, I got a copy of the anthology with my story in it. It’s kind of an anticlimax because all I care about is what I’m working on now; but, I’m still pretty proud…

        Like

  1. The harmonica was another one of those stupid parting party gifts someone gave one of my kids – I steered clear of the entire floor any child was on when they were just making that thing screech. It was a good joke though – the butcher shop cracked me up too 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. My voice is kind of reedy, so I seldom read my own stuff out loud. I’m thinking of finding a cartoon horse to read it. The reason I post is because I couldn’t find any humor sites with original humor… just gifs and the same jokes over and over.

      My ex and I actually get along. I had her over for Thanksgiving dinner because I didn’t want her to spend it alone. She’s a pain in the ass but no longer MY pain in the ass…

      Liked by 1 person

      1. LOL! You write the shit and I’ll take the stage, reedy, raspy, whatever! Being in front of an audience is the most joy you’ll ever experience with your clothes on! I’ve done it! But…that was back in the day…

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s