How to Tell if Your Species is About to Become Extinct

The Secret Life Of The Dodo

You can’t live inside walls, under sinks, or get inside a dumpster…

You have an innate need to cross six-lane highways.

An apex-predator has been introduced into your ecosystem and, besides eating apexes, it also eats everything that you eat plus you and your friends.

A real estate agent says, “And, this is where the pool will be” and he’s pointing at the tree you are living in.

Your favorite food no longer grows due to climate change, but that’s okay because it never would’ve survived the forest fires, anyway.

You aren’t cute or interesting enough for our world’s zoos to want to breed more of you…

You’ve dropped three levels in the food chain.

Someone has discovered how delicious you are.

Your natural habitat is a super-fund site.

The northern-most point of your migration route has the consistency of a daiquiri…

17 thoughts on “How to Tell if Your Species is About to Become Extinct

  1. So, my newest conspiracy theory is that the ALIENS are the ones who started the coronavirus and caused us to lock ourselves indoors to just gorge our faces and get super plumpy. I’m thinking once we have all reached our maximum taste potential, we’re done for. Dinner will be served and there goes the human race (except for the scrawny ones).

    Liked by 1 person

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