Well-Preserved Facts about Sauerkraut

8 Surprising Benefits of Sauerkraut (Plus How to Make It)

Americans consume nearly four hundred million pounds of sauerkraut each year. Oddly enough, it is only consumed by ten Americans and all in the same two week period.

Sauerkraut is fat free! And, so are roofing tiles!

Preserved cabbage was invented by the Chinese around the time of the building of the Great Wall. Both deterred foreigners from invading but only the cabbage could be spit into a napkin.

Sauerkraut prevents scurvy… still no word on what prevents sauerkraut…

Sauerkraut relies on the fermentation process to give it its characteristic texture and flavor. It takes at least two weeks for the process to finish. Roofing tiles can be eaten right out of the package.

Sauerkraut contains nine percent of the folate you need for your daily requirements. Folate is essential for the production of DNA. Not enough folate causes the body’s DNA to break down and you have to go through evolution all over again.

Sauerkraut is probiotic, meaning that it adds organisms to your body that can aid in digestion; and, if you listen hard enough, they’ll even whisper the answers to your SAT test questions.

During World War Two, Americans referred to sauerkraut as “liberty cabbage”. In retaliation, Germans referred to hamburgers as “mashed cow sandwiches”…

When making your own sauerkraut, you can determine if your sauerkraut is bad if it doesn’t smell like nail polish remover mixed with road kill. Throw it out, in this case, and start a new batch that you hope will be sufficiently awful.

Sauerkraut is high in fiber. If you make a sports coat out of it, you might want to put hot dogs in the pockets…

17 thoughts on “Well-Preserved Facts about Sauerkraut

      1. [ me too! But shhhh….after I eat I walk around the house to the faces of the dismayed saying something along the lines of, “It wasn’t me!
        Okay, it was. Sauerkraut sorry…”]

        Liked by 1 person

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