Random Thoughts that Backed their Car over My Neighbor’s Dog

Official Baltimore Orioles Website | MLB.com


If you meet a donut at a singles’ bar, never ask its Zodiac sign because it is always torus.

There are countless reasons why I cannot accept the concept of infinity.

I don’t want to bore you with the details; but, if I can bore you with a general overview, I’m an orator to be FEARED…

Anyone who will take fruit over french fries is probably wearing a choke-collar.

I have to live, every day, with the inevitability of failure. Why yes, I AM a Baltimore Orioles fan…

My uncle once said that the music he liked was “Bach, Bach, Bach”. Turns out, he didn’t like Bach at all… he was just being slowly turned into a chicken.

I’ve spent my whole life striving for material wealth, when all I ever really needed was a billion dollars in gold coins…

There are two ways to go through life: One way is to assume there are only two ways to go through life; the other way is to assume the opposite. I choose neither.

Back when I used to drink, I’d take my dog and we’d drink beers at an outdoor cafe… but, the dog had non-alcoholic beer because SOMEONE had to drive.

She spoke so loudly that I couldn’t hear her over the sound of her voice.

14 thoughts on “Random Thoughts that Backed their Car over My Neighbor’s Dog

  1. I’m the fruit person. And the salad person. I leave every meal unsatisfied. But since I sneak a french fry off someone’s plate to try and compensate for my displeasure – well, I guess I need someone to up the shock on my choke collar.

    Liked by 1 person

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