Bitter FAQs about Capers

Where do capers grow? Any of the arid regions around the Mediterranean where there is so little food that people pick flower buds and pickle them because there is little else to eat.

How are capers harvested? In the morning they are picked manually by local virgins.  By hand, because they are fragile. In the morning, because the moisture keeps them from falling apart. And, by virgins, because they aren’t as worn out in the mornings…

Are capers toxic to cats? No, but you can always add a little poison if you like.

How can I tell if my capers have gone bad? Taste one. If it has a bitter, unpleasant, nasty taste it is probably still good.

Should capers be washed before eating? That’s a trick question because you shouldn’t be eating them.

What are the benefits of eating capers? The main benefit is, no one in your household is going to wake up hungry in the middle of the night and eat all your capers… or any of your capers.

No, I mean the health benefits to eating capers? Capers contain a lot of copper. So, if you eat enough of them, you can always find work as a high voltage line.

Can I eat capers right out of the jar? You can, but capers are best enjoyed as an ingredient in dishes that have flavors strong enough to mask the taste of the capers.

My capers have white spots on them. Should I throw them away? Yes.

My capers don’t have white spots on them. Should I throw them away? Again, yes.