All elevators are equipped with mechanical brakes that will stop the falling elevator just seconds after you soil your pants.
♣
If your elevator is plummeting, try pressing all the buttons. Maybe it will find a floor it likes.
♣
If others are in the elevator while it falls, try to calm them by shrieking something comforting.
♣
You can save your life by jumping just before the elevator hits bottom if you are a cartoon character.
♣
If the elevator mishap is a murder and you know who did it, write the name of the murderer on the carpet as you fall, with your blood, spit or urine. If the name is too long to finish, just make a quick no-frills sketch of the murderer.
♣
If your elevator is falling, quickly tear off the front of the control panel and find the two wires that, when spliced together, temporarily stop gravity from happening.
♣
Scan the other passengers in the elevator to quickly see if one of them is Superman.
♣
In your last two seconds, grab that red phone and tell whoever answers what you think of their elevator maintenance.
♣
You’ll be weightless for a couple of seconds as you plummet… making that the perfect time to get a new driver’s license photo.
♣
As you fall to an almost certain death it is helpful to remember that walking down that many stairs would’ve probably killed you, anyway…
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
That last one is a classic 😂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks, Deb!
LikeLike
But what if my murderer was WEARING frills?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Like… a pirate shirt?
LikeLike
More like southern belle gone very wrong 😱
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m not sure elevator Pictionary would work for me, I think I’ll just try to use another passenger as a cushion when we hit.
LikeLiked by 3 people
I thought about recommending that but I have a feeling that I’d end up being the cushion….
LikeLiked by 1 person
The perfect opportunity to do an Einsteinian thought experiment utilizing the fly buzzing around you
LikeLiked by 1 person
In any frame of reference, I’d be screaming all the way down…
LikeLike
Ah, so you’d be investigating the Doppler Effect?
LikeLike
You have a real knack for tapping into our most private fears 🤓🤓🤓
LikeLiked by 2 people
‘Cause they’re my fears as well. Especially the clear elevators where you can see to the bottom. What MONSTER invented these???
LikeLiked by 2 people
I don’t know, but I bet he/she is related to Stephen King 😬
LikeLiked by 2 people
This is why I’ll never ride Hollywood Tower of Terror, where people pay for the privilege. And Superman better own up 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
He can’t save everyone… He has deadlines just like every other newsperson…
LikeLiked by 2 people
I’m just sayin’, if he’s in the elevator with me–it’s time to pull off the glasses and start humming the theme music
LikeLiked by 2 people
You sure you don’t just have a crush on Henry Cavill…?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’d have a crush on Danny DeVito, if he saved a falling elevator from crashing with me in it 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
So, you must LOVE Always Sunny in Philadelphia…
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’ve actually never seen it
LikeLiked by 1 person
He came in Season 2… It’s a difficult show for me to watch because all the characters are just awful people… but, my son wants me to experience it.
LikeLike
I read recently that laughter reduces inflammation. As an arthritis sufferer … thank you. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very glad you found something to laugh at!
LikeLiked by 1 person
with your help. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have an elevator in my house, however I don’t worry about plummeting — my house is a one-story ranch (but I do worry about the ranch taking matters into its own hands while I’m dressing).
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m just going to LOL…
LikeLiked by 1 person