Why I’m Dating my Wall

Image result for living room wall

The bathroom ceiling rejected me.

Image result for heart

A wall may become cold and distant, but she’ll never leave me… unless there’s a tornado or something.

Image result for heart

My wall and I have an active fantasy life. Sometimes, I’ll put a pinup poster on her and pretend she’s load-bearing.

Image result for heart

Every wall has two sides: The good side… and the horrid bitchy side that craps on everything you’ve ever done.

Image result for heart

My wall has no parents for me to deal with. A mother-in-wall only exists in the fevered nightmares of dyslexics…

Image result for heart

My wall may never hold me in warm embrace; but, it also won’t wait until I go downstairs for coffee and steal my medication.

Image result for heart

My living room wall never gains weight… except the time we found two squirrels living in her.

Image result for heart

If my wall rejects me, she has three twin sisters that would love a shot at me…

Image result for heart

My wall stays close to home, except the time she went to a poetry slam with the water heater. While she was out, my upstairs bathroom crashed into my basement. She finally understood that she WAS important…

Image result for heart

After years together, I and my wall can anticipate each other’s needs…

Image result for heart

She’s a good listener… unlike my ceiling fan…

Image result for heart

 

14 thoughts on “Why I’m Dating my Wall

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s