Prop swords are expensive; but, you can gut a grapefruit with just a spoon.
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A grapefruit opera is the only type of opera with a full day’s supply of vitamin C.
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A dozen grapefruits singing in harmony would be enchanting… I’d imagine… Also a little disturbing…
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In a grapefruit opera, you can always tell who the villain will be. Hint: It’s always the grapefruit.
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The time of day in which most grapefruit opera’s are set? Breakfast or brunch.
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In most grapefruit operas, the theme is conformity and perhaps rolling. They occasionally address the genocide that is juicers.
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It doesn’t matter what language the opera is performed in because grapefruits speak all languages equally well.
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The sourness of grapefruit should discourage audience members from bolting onto the stage and taking a bite out of one of the performers, as happened to Pavoratti during a production of Tosca.
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If there is a sword-fight sequence in your grapefruit opera, prepare to sweep up a lot of seeds.
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If the grapefruit opera gets a bad review, it won’t matter much because a grapefruit has a pretty thick skin.
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
And when the performance is over, the audience all break out their bottles of gin and have cocktails. It’s a win win.
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That’s the spirit!
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Literally, yes.
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Grapefruit Operas? The limes will revolt 😳
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They’re never happy, anyway.
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Grapefruits and olives are the devil’s food. They are definitely always the villain! Evil, evil foods.
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Even the olives with the pimentos???
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ALL the olives. Evil little creatures. Try to enhance them by putting them on something like pizza and I turn into Tom Hanks in Big when he is at the party and trying to clean his tongue off from such foul food.
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You have strong opinions and I want to subscribe to your newsletter!
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I think I’d find such an opera to leave a sour taste in my mouth.
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It’s easier if you just watch it in segments…
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Much better than grapefruit ballet. They just don’t have the proper line.
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Their pas de deuxs are actually pas de don’ts…
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