Never go to bed angry. Discuss your issues with your spouse until you both come to the realization that you’ll never be compatible; then, you can go to bed sad.
♥
Sometimes you need to do something your spouse likes. This might be a baseball game; or, a nice drink at an upscale bar where your spouse calls your waitress a “whore” and throws chairs and centerpieces until the police show up and tase her into a reasonable state of docility. She’ll sleep tonight…
♥
Be respectful of your spouse’s hopes and anxieties; but, phobias are fair game for you to exploit. You can’t completely disarm yourself.
♥
Ask her about her day. If she can feign enthusiasm you can at least feign interest…
♥
You can share in the traditional tasks your spouse does except for crushing your spirit. That’s specialty work!
♥
Most marital fights are about money and almost never about having too much of it.
♥
Remember that marriage is a two-way street; but, try to resist the urge to grab the wheel and steer into on-coming traffic.
♥
Always present a united front to your children: Don’t contradict your spouse until he or she has left the room.
♥
Remember the things that attracted you to your spouse in the first place; and, reflect on how saggy those things are, today.
♥
After thirty years of marriage, it is perfectly okay to feign some degree of deafness.
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
I know all about that last one ☹️
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So did my ex.
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I’ll never feign deafness with you Charles 😊
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I think that, once I get wound up and talking, people start rethinking suicide as a deadly sin…
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Not sure if I should say I like this! Very funny and enough truth in it that it scares me!
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I have to agree 🙂
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The truth is often terrifying… but not as terrifying as a tiger with a death ray mounted on his head…
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And the reasons for your divorce become more clear…
🤣
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I know… it was because I was so AWESOME!!!
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If you uttered that saggy comment out loud? It’s a wonder you’re alive….
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It can be applied to either gender. And, yes, it is a wonder I’m still alive.
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“Many a woman would get a divorce if she could do it without making her husband happy.” –Anonymous (no kidding)
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Two weeks after my wife and I separated, my chest pains stopped.
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A good tasing really does do wonders for your sleep. I wouldn’t know first hand of course. A friend told me.
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I’m sure you’ve had the police called on you, Robyn. We all have!
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I’m still waiting to earn my first tasing though! I could use a good night’s rest.
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A taser is like a warm hug from a crazy grandmother!
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Sometimes I’m glad I’m single.
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They each have their pros and cons. I was married for about twenty-five years. But, if I told you everything I know, you’d scream and avoid people for the rest of your life. Actually, not a bad idea…
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Wry and insightful, as ever 🤣👍
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Wry? Because we rike you!
M-o-u-s-e!
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