Something might’ve gone wrong with his jet-pack…
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I over-inflated him.
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He got into the pork chop-flavored alka-seltzer that I keep in the medicine cabinet.
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I suspect that the animal I trained and nurtured might’ve been a propane tank. That would explain why he hissed instead of barked.
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I pulled his pin.
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He ate a case of Girl Scout cookies and reached critical mass.
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Was he a service dog? Yeah, a FUNERAL service dog. [puts on fedora and lights up a cigarette… walks slowly into the rain]
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I put him into a hot oven but forgot to prick him all over with a fork.
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I took him to a neighbor’s house and she had a lot of cats. Maybe my dog tried to go in eight directions at the same time. He was both indecisive and insanely determined…
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He pooped in some guy’s yard who turned out to be a Scanner.
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It is probably my fault because I’ve been using him as a water heater but never installed a thermostat…
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He might’ve been working as a model for Jackson Pollack.
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
I over inflated him, hysterical Charles 😊
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I forgot to use the pressure gauge, NP…
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Your on a roll Charles 😊
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Mostly, I’m just trying to adapt to the new job. Nice coworkers… but their infrastructure is HUGE.
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I’ll go with the scanner theory. Bout time the best movie ever came to life.
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I thought that reference was too obscure. Thanks, Bob!
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This is quite disturbing.
I didn’t realize there was a critical mass for Girl Scout cookies. One more Thin Mint could put me over the edge…
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It’s the Do Si Does you have to worry about…
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That’s good news! I hate peanut butter..
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Give a boxer a spoon of peanut butter some time and you’ll have an hour of fun and slobbers…
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Everyone is so serious and scared and angry these days. Thanks for offering us all some comic relief.
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I like to make people laugh.
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Then you must be a happy person, because you do. 🙂
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Thank you!
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This post is just begging for a hot dog joke. I can’t think of one now, but I’ll put it on the front buner.
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Thanks for being so frank with me…
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