[Thanks to Deb’s husband for the idea]
Leave it outside of a cadaver warehouse and someone will just assume it fell out of a window somewhere.
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Find a construction site where a large cement foundation is being poured and leave the body near the mailbox.
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Throw the body into an active volcano. If the person wasn’t a virgin, the volcano gods will react violently, destroying the entire island, but his Magic the Gathering cards make virginity almost a certainty.
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Find a school of piranha and pay them fifty dollars to drag the body outside of a cadaver warehouse.
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Coat the body in cornmeal and deep fry it. Leave it on the ground at the state fair and people will think it is a discarded corndog.
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Take the body to a Voodoo priestess who will turn it into a zombie. Warning: If not watched, it WILL vote Republican.
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Open a butcher shop and sell a “special” sausage. With the money from sales of your special sausage, you can afford to pay piranha to drag the body to a cadaver warehouse.
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Bury the body in a Pet Sematary so when he rises from the grave, profoundly evil, you can convince him to create his own cryptocurrency.
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Mail the body to Santa Claus. That way, when he’s put on trial for lunacy, the post office will forward his mail to the courtroom and his lawyer will offer, “Eleven bodies, all mailed to Santa Claus and all delivered to this address”.
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Leave the body in a massage chair at a spa. By the time they realize the deep-seated tension is actually rigormortis, you’ll be long gone.
Love it C, I’ll make sure we have those prihna teed up
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Easier than keeping a Pet Sematary nearby, Deb.
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Don’t know about that, I have 4 dogs in my laundry cupboard
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So… the zombies on The Walking Dead are all Republicans?????
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Well, the ones with the red hats are, for sure….
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🤣🤣🤣
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Excellent suggestions all, but now you’ve got me wondering about Deb’s husband and her future safety.
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I won’t reveal what she told me but it sounded like her husband was just considering his options in a non-Deb area.
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And you’ve just helped him get more creative. That’s what I call friendship…
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Australians ARE our brothers across the Pacific…
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But what about the sisters…?
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Anything that empowers women, count me out! You guys already outlive us.
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Stand it up next to the press secretary at a Presidential press conference…
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Um, I’m cutting a cadaver out of a straight jacket. Do they make coffins with a recess in their flooring for this purpose?
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No, the recesses are for the servant that will be buried alive with your body to serve you in the afterlife.
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Ah! Thank you so much for clearing that up.
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If I wanted to dispose of a dead body, I’d drive it to a state in Tornado Alley, where it would soon be Gone With The Wind. If caught, I’d just say Rhett Butler did it.
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Or, they’d just assume he was bludgeoned to death by hail…
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Secret’s in the sauce!
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The deodorant?
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You’ve never seen Fried Green Tomatoes?!
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Do I really seem like someone who’s seen Fried Green Tomatoes?
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You’ve got a point 😀
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