Signs that You’ve Smoked Enough Pot

Stoned dog: fixed : r/funny

You’ve watched three straight hours of Yogi Bear and the television isn’t plugged in.

You give such a stirring and iron-clad defense of the poetry of T. S. Eliot that the pile of laundry you are arguing with has no good response.

Someone quips that John Wick is a candle you light in the bathroom and you laugh so violently that you hit your head on a coffee table.

Ska suddenly seems like a great idea.

You try to open a bag of Doritos but it outsmarts you and gets away.

Your dog rolls her eyes whenever you say something.

You have trouble understanding simple sentences that are simple to understand if you are having trouble understanding despite their simplicity…

You get paranoid about the van parked near your home despite the fact that it is your van.

You’ve finished all the cookies and Red Vines and the paint chips on the window sill are starting to look like a viable snack.

You say surreal things like, “Yes, I’d love to see a one-man show based on the life of Lyndon Johnson”.

15 thoughts on “Signs that You’ve Smoked Enough Pot

  1. The television not plugged in reminded me of one such instance of my younger years. Group of friends met up at one guy’s house, the boys smoked up, and on the telly a Tamil channel played for well over an hour, before one guy actually sobered up enough to ask everyone “who amongst us understands Tamil?”. Nobody did. 🤦‍♀️

    Liked by 1 person

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