You’ve watched three straight hours of Yogi Bear and the television isn’t plugged in.
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You give such a stirring and iron-clad defense of the poetry of T. S. Eliot that the pile of laundry you are arguing with has no good response.
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Someone quips that John Wick is a candle you light in the bathroom and you laugh so violently that you hit your head on a coffee table.
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Ska suddenly seems like a great idea.
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You try to open a bag of Doritos but it outsmarts you and gets away.
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Your dog rolls her eyes whenever you say something.
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You have trouble understanding simple sentences that are simple to understand if you are having trouble understanding despite their simplicity…
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You get paranoid about the van parked near your home despite the fact that it is your van.
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You’ve finished all the cookies and Red Vines and the paint chips on the window sill are starting to look like a viable snack.
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You say surreal things like, “Yes, I’d love to see a one-man show based on the life of Lyndon Johnson”.
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
Ska stole the doritoes C. That’s what ska does
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Ska, if it were a D&D character, would be chaotic neutral…
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A one man Lydon B Johnson show about his times in New York City where all the characters have distinct, yet poorly performed, accents does seem enticing…
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It’s like a New England production of A Streetcar Named Desire….
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Substitute cat for dog and it sounds like me in the early 80’s. I swear that Doritos bag is still laughing…
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You had a cat that rolled its eyes?
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He lived with me. How could he not….
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“You get paranoid about the van parked near your home despite the fact that it is your van.” 🤣🤣🤣
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That’s because I KNOW who owns that van!… 😱
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The call is coming from INSIDE THE HOUSE!!!
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What, you TOO??? 🤣
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🤣🤣🤣
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The television not plugged in reminded me of one such instance of my younger years. Group of friends met up at one guy’s house, the boys smoked up, and on the telly a Tamil channel played for well over an hour, before one guy actually sobered up enough to ask everyone “who amongst us understands Tamil?”. Nobody did. 🤦♀️
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You believe you understand the entire universe and you spend the rest of your life attempting to explain it.
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I did once find myself filling out a Sudoku in alphabetical order…
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