Whether you are at a party or just mumbling to yourself on the subway, everyone needs a conversation starter. Something to make people ponder, think or move to another seat. Here are some that have served me well:
If shoes could laugh, what do you think they would laugh at and why?
If you could sleep with anyone in the world, living or dead, would you opt for “living”?
Which historical figure would you most want to sexually abuse you? Did you say “Johann Von Goethe”? Because that’s who most people choose.
What childhood memory do you have that is most likely fabricated? What would you do if it was ALL fabricated and you are actually in a coma dreaming your life? Not much, I’d imagine…
If you were a ventriloquist and being circumcised, would you give in to the temptation to make your penis appear to scream?
What passage in the Bible do you think works best against warts?
If you knew someone was a serial killer, would you still let them shampoo your hair?
If someone offered you twenty million dollars, but you’d have to agree to shoot a sweet innocent child in the head to get it, what ammunition would you use?
If you were told that you could fill the Grand Canyon up with one species of fish, and carp was not a viable choice, when would it become obvious to you that you probably misheard?
What animal would you most like to bring back from extinction, dress in a tuxedo and ballroom dance with?
If you were a Rabbi performing a bris and the penis screamed when you applied the blade, would you rethink circumcising ventriloquists?
Looking back on your various boyfriends and/or girlfriends, which of them do you think were robots?
How likely would you be to shop naked if they store’s owner told you it was okay? Would you avoid the freezer aisle?