What do you call the bottom of a pineapple upside-down cake?
I’ve been hypnotizing bears to think that they are caterpillars. My theory is, when they emerge from hibernation, they will have wings; even if they don’t, it will be fun to watch them run from blue jays.
My birth certificate has an asterisk on it and no one will tell me what it means.
Trix, they say, are for kids… but, no one ever checks your ID.
If you ever act as happy as a dog at dinner-time, you will be institutionalized.
It’s hard to arrange to have your baby born at Windsor Castle; but, if you are sufficiently sneaky, you can conceive your child there.
In Shakespeare’s time, before you stabbed someone, you exclaimed, “Have at you!”, giving the victim a chance to dodge, draw his sword or at least blurt out, “I am slain!” Today, people just get stabbed without a word. What monsters we have become!
Yesterday, I dreamed that I was a butterfly. Today, am I a butterfly dreaming I am a man? Or, more likely, a bear?
Why do we spend so much money manufacturing laxatives when we can just import tap water from Mexico?
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist. The second greatest trick? Sawing a lady in half. Seriously, how does he do that?
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
I think would be cool with cartoons to your so-true messages. Can I ask a question …does a sense of humor changes as we age?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes. I think it gets less angry…
LikeLiked by 1 person
interesting… I need to think about it.
LikeLike
Import tap water from Mexico – hahaha
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yeah… I liked that one, too…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Delusional … you’re a cane toad
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well, I AM cold-blooded…
LikeLiked by 1 person
You probably are of an age to remember that there were stores like Woolworth’s that used to advertise selling “notions.” I think that’s where Mark Twain got all his best ideas.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m even old enough to remember Mae West’s famous line after the man she’s talking to says that he’s selling novelties and notions: “What notions have you got?”
LikeLiked by 1 person
And Groucho’s line to the department store heiress: “Marry me and your concern will be my concern. “
LikeLiked by 1 person
The Big Store, right?
LikeLike