Your parents tell you that you can wear the outfit in public, but, only if they can talk to your pimp first.
When you go for a walk, you notice men accidentally wandering into traffic.
Your cleavage is listed as one of your area’s landmarks.
No one tells you that you look like a million dollars. They put the price at a hundred and fifty dollars for the half hour.
More people have seen the tattoo on your upper thigh than have seen the Lego Movie.
Since you started working at the machine shop, five men have lost eleven fingers.
If your entire outfit can fit in a Starbucks cup.
You own a formal tube-top.
Streetwalkers come up to you and tell you to, “Dial it back a little”…
You’ve been rated PG-13 by the motion picture association of America.
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
Now that’s a bit sexist … equal opportunities mate. I want one being scatching towards reptiles next.
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Seriously, difficult to find images of a woman in a short skirt???? Go to google images and type it in, or better yet type in men in short skirts. The multicolored kilt is quite nice I think.
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Literally nothing serious about that…
Yeah, I know it’s pretty sexist and I TRIED to include men; but, I don’t know what you ladies consider sexy besides “not me”…
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I find a man sexy who can cook dinner while wearing a pinafore, but thats just me 😊
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I cook very well, but they don’t make pinofore’s in my size. I guess I’m hopeless…
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sexist, and its a big debate in India with people, including elected leaders blaming clothes for crimes against women. provocation lies in the eyes of the beholder?
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I’d never blame a woman for crimes against her, even if she was stark naked in heels. But, that’s the list that came out of me…
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I know, you did it for fun .. unlike the politicians
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Every once in a while I post a list I know some of my readers won’t like. I don’t do it on purpose, but when my range of topics includes EVERYTHING, that’s going to happen. I did one on depression that irritated people, despite my admission of severe chronic depression.
Buuuut, tomorrow I’ll write about ghosts and everything will be swell again…
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Sexist, yes.
But now you’ve got me wondering what a formal tube looks like…
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Black, with a white vertical stripe… and a clip-on bow-tie. Suitable for bridal parties in the deep south…
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Ah…
Of course.
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‘More people have seen the tattoo on your upper thigh than have seen the Lego Movie.’
If I had been drinking coffee at the time of reading this, I surely would have spit it all over the screen. Out of respect, I’ll be sure to do that later.
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Spit it on someone you love!
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Just to be provocative, I dug up two women’s “women’s dress” quotes, the first of which I’ll take her word for, and the second of which, if it means what I think she means (and I agreed), I’d probably be called a rat :
“Women dress alike all over the world: they dress to be annoying to other women.” –Elsa Schiaparelli
“Most women dress as if they had been a mouse in a previous incarnation, , or hope to be one in the next.”
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I think you just succeeded in being provocative…
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I forgot to attribute the second quote to Edith Sitwell.
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Too late. She contacted me and told me she was looking for you. Stay low and God bless…
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Her threat doesn’t Sitwell with me; nonetheless, since she’s long dead, I’ll try to avoid her old haunts.
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Today’s post is relevant…
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“If your entire outfit can fit in a Starbucks cup.” Now my mind is wondering if any of my outfits COULD accomplish this. Probably not a small cup – but those grandes, hmmmmm
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I grew up in the deep south in the seventies. I know that some of the outfits could’ve fit in a coffee cup with enough room left over for some of that awful blue eye-shadow…
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I’d be hard pressed to get my SOCKS into a Starbucks cup 🤣
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I’d be hard-pressed to find a REASON to put my socks into a Starbucks cup…
Oh wait… I’ve got one…
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🤣
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