I got the idea from River’s World. Yeah, it’s a little weak but I thought, “what do I care? My readers deserve nothing from me” But, I was immediately sorry when my readers left the room in tears. I was confused: Do I follow? When I follow THAT never helps things… but when I DON’T follow, THAT’S when I really get into trouble. Well, the important thing is, I’m sorry…
So, what DO fish think?
“Cogito Ergo Swum: I sink, therefore I swam”
“A worm? Dangling here? I’ve noticed that all of my friends that have taken one of these worms has disappeared without a trace. I wonder if it has something to do with—oh, look! A delicious cricket with a hook in it!”
“Would it be easier to swim upstream and avoid bears, fishermen and dams to spawn and die; or, to just admit to my parents that I’m gay and continue living with my roommate in the ocean?”
“Five thousand more laps around the tiny castle and I will have lived an eventful life”
“When God is pleased, fish food falls from the sky; when God is angry, there is a great tapping of the glass”
“I’m sorry I cheated on you, Doris; but, she led me on with her pheromones and bursting egg sac… plus, you haven’t been giving me the attention you once did… plus a fish has needs, you know (I like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain)… AND, it was inevitable because WE ARE ALL COMPLETELY IDENTICAL… which is the excuse I should’ve led with…”
“Why yes, I’m a Pisces…. We’re ALL Pisces”
“A psychedelic jam-band named after me? Really? There’s a band called ‘Steven’?”
“Sometimes I want to leave the water and evolve into something more… something with complex emotions and abstract thoughts; then, I remember that I can pee wherever I want and eat my own children and I think, ‘Why ruin a good thing?’”
“I don’t mind being eaten by a dolphin. I just HATE that sarcastic expression on their faces”
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
You just had to mention the pina colada thing, didn’t you?
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It seemed topical…
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Really? How many people actually recall that song, do you think 🤔
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Considering what an “ear-worm” it is, probably a lot, Deb… After you brought it up, it was in my head for about eight hours…
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Most excellent. I’ve wondered about this for years and shall now view aquariums with a different mindset. While looking for Steve….
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😀 Loved the Latin; and “we’re all Pisces!”
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Thanks. It’s one of those topics that I felt compelled to finish just because…
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YOU took control this time with the pina colada song – made me laugh 🙂 And the pisces and the “why ruin a good thing?” Actually the whole thing had me smiling – fun to read 🙂
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Well… fun to write as well…
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Hysterical, as always. “I’m glad I have a short attention span. Otherwise I’d go outta my little fish mind swimming around this bowl endlessly…”
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I could’ve replaced the dolphin one with that…
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Glad to contribute…but I like the dolphin one too…
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I can’t come up with anything original here, so I’ll quote Evan Esar just to give you someone to boo for a pun that doesn’t end well: “The life of fishes is ova before it begins.”
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Eggsactly!
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😉
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“I’m mostly a vegetarian, but I eat a piece of human from time to time.”
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Fish comedians: “To get to the other side? I don’t get it.”
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“I know you’re out there. I can hear you not breathing”
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Boom! Great line.
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Dolphins look sarcastic because they are intelligent?
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And, cocky…
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