[I had a high fever on Monday and a cough. It didn’t last too long but what there was of it was more than sufficient. I’m quarantining myself after talking to my doctor but I’m doing just fine at this point.]
Fevers muddle your thinking, making them the perfect time to watch daytime talk shows and have meaningful talks with your teenagers who might or might not be there at the time.
Chicken soup helps with a lot of illnesses involving fever; as an added bonus, when your soup gets cold, you can warm it on your head.
Viruses cause fevers; but, fevers kill viruses. This implies that viruses actually WANT to die… they are sorry for what they are doing. How I pity them…
The above fact doesn’t include the fever for the flavor of a Pringles. That fever is alleviated by Pringles… the original cause of that fever.
Another term for fever is “ague”. It is a very important word that has never been used outside of Sherlock Holmes novels and crossword puzzles.
“Yellow Fever” is a misnomer. It is more of a burnt sienna. This becomes obvious when you try to coordinate your wardrobe to your illness.
Fevers might give you horrible or bizarre dreams. So a fever is essentially a pizza without the heartburn.
Young children get alarmingly high fevers. Often they get delirious. You can tell that is happening because they’ll be making sense.
The word “fever” is also a misnomer. I’ve seen a lot of fevers but I’ve never seen one feve.
If you don’t have a medical thermometer, you can substitute a candy thermometer. Use it the same way, but if you are at the soft ball stage, immediately see a physician…