Fun Facts About Florida

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Rick Scott after feeding on the souls of the elderly

Florida calls itself, “The Sunshine State”, presumably because “State Overrun By Poisonous Reptiles and Deadly Insects” was already taken by Louisiana.

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Florida’s governor, Rick Scott, has been named, “Most Monstrous Governor” three years in a row.

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Florida’s state bird is the mosquito…

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Florida’s primary exports are citrus, sugar, tomatoes and pain killers.

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Europeans discovered Florida in 1513, when Ponce de Leon arrived on an expedition to seek out the Fountain of Youth. According to an interview with Ponce de Leon conducted just last month, he was unsuccessful.

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Florida’s largest city is Jacksonville. Their motto? “For God’s Sake, Keep Your Car Doors Locked”.

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Andrew Jackson was briefly military governor of Florida. His biggest failing was not getting the Seminoles on board with his sweeping “kill all Indians” policy…

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Florida is the first to have state-wide garbage disposal: Residents are encouraged to dump their trash onto convenient roadsides and highway shoulders.

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Florida may not be the sunniest state in the union; but, it is the sunniest state in which you have a really good chance of being eaten by an alligator.

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Floridians are known for having strong and incomprehensible political opinions, a love of firearms and for chewing people’s faces off while under the influence of bath salts…

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