Fun Avocado Facts that Aren’t that Much Fun or Factual

Avocados: What's wrong with them?

An avocado has around 600 mg of potassium… nearly twice that of a banana but two hundred times less potassium than what is in the human body. So, if you really need potassium, turn to cannibalism.

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Avocado is a healthy substitute for butter; however, it can take up to six days to melt over your popcorn…

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The avocado is NOT a vegetable… it is a fruit… like THAT’S cool…

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Mexico grows avocados all year round because, unlike people, avocados CAN drink the water there…

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The skin and pits of an avocado are toxic to dogs and cats; so, if you are getting tired of that yapping hairy mosquito your girlfriend calls a dog, you know what to do…

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The Aztecs forbade virgins from eating avocados finally giving women there a good reason to have sex.

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The avocado’s giant seed was meant to pass through the digestive tract of a giant armadillo without being digested. Virgin giant armadillos did not eat avocados.

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Avocado” is derived from the Aztec word for “testicles”… although you have to look very closely to see an avocado’s testicles.

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Brazilians and Indonesians make a chocolate milkshake from avocados. It has a smooth velvety texture and looks like someone has already digested it for you. Maybe a giant armadillo.

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Wanna ripen an avocado fast? Put it in a paper bag with a couple of bananas. Wanna take your monkey on a plane without having to pay for a seat? Do the same thing to it.

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20 thoughts on “Fun Avocado Facts that Aren’t that Much Fun or Factual

    1. Well, I was sitting around, yesterday, with no column for today; and, I thought to myself, “What is a topic I could get some mileage out of? I know… a fruit whose name is testicles”…

      Like

    1. There were facts in there… but, they are kind of mixed up with the rest of it. That kind of begs the question, “If there is as much chance as something being the truth as being a lie, what good is it?”

      Liked by 1 person

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