A one dollar surtax on every time a Texan uses the phrase, “That’s what SHE said” unless they are using it to convey what a female human or parrot actually said.
Sell our tanks and missiles to smaller countries who are already at war on the condition that we get to film it and turn it into a reality show.
Tax solar energy by determining how much sun should be hitting the United States, then subtracting how much actually got here…
Get a million monkeys with a million typewriters because, odds are, all of them will come up with better budgets than our politicians come up with.
Reinstate looting. Send hordes of GIs into smaller countries and give them orders to just take nice things.
Hold the world’s largest bake sale: Invite Canada. They are so polite, they will feel obligated to buy something.
Wait for Mexico to pay for the border wall, then, after dark, pack it all up and sell it to North Korea.
Start a pyramid scheme: Set up a line of Americans, six million across… on their hands and knees, another row with one fewer citizen on top of them…. and so on until the top level leaves the atmosphere. While up there, they can grab all the ducks, moon rocks and satellites they can carry.
Sell Manhattan back to the American Indians, but with interest…
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
I’ll come to the bake sale if there are proper macaroons
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I’ll see what I can do.
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My son isn’t from Texas but with all the “that’s what SHE said” jokes I hear per day, I know his share would make somewhat of a dent if taxed. Either that or I say go with the monkeys. I think they could come up with a more intelligent solution as well.
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But, how would you feed and clean up after a million monkeys? Well, you and I have children so we know exactly what would be involved… My oldest is twenty-seven and makes a mess worthy of at least a thousand monkeys…
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The worlds largest bake sale is a stellar idea. Can I preorder 12 million brownie bites?
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With or without pecans?
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Without. If I had 24 million nuts the squirrel horde would collapse my roof.
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The wall idea is a good one. Every time another country pays for it you can pack it up and sell to another country. I’m sure there’s plenty to choose from.
Also, as someone who lives in a smaller country, some of those ideas worry me.
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Yeah, but you aren’t at war with anyone… YET!
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Identify money for what it is: pretend. Then no one will care, and what we call “debt” will magically vanish.
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It’s the whole idea behind bitcoin…
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Sell Trump to the Russians for a zero IOU. It won’t reduce our debt, but it will make America great again (or at least as great as it was BT (Before Trump).
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I have a feeling he’ll be moving there when the investigations start…
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