A light opera about salt-water crocodiles
Aerosol grape jelly
A seeing eye rhinoceros so the blind can navigate through packed crowds
A pine cone circus
A little refrigerator you can fit inside your microwave.
A line of condolence cards based upon the movie Ben Hur.
A television series about a fat, pony-tailed humorist who fights evil at night and writes lists that no one reads by day.
Cat stimulants.
Liquefied omelet drinks for people on the go.
A special brassiere for women who’ve been born with their hearts outside their chests.
Sperm bank ATMs
Bandaid-flavored jelly beans
Where’s Waldo books in braille
Salmon room freshener
Disposable engagement rings
Scented cattle-prods
Lavender-flavored beef jerky
Semi-flat house paint
“My Daughter has sex for drugs” t-shirts
Vegetarian walrus chow.
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 