Grandiose Thoughts that, in the End, Mean Nothing

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Come at me, brah!

The person you should really be competing with is yourself… because, when competing with others, you are horribly outclassed…

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I tried to explore my own sexuality but ended up finding a sea route to the West Indies. I decided to keep trying to explore my sexuality but law enforcement on that island has little patience for that sort of nonsense…

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After hearing a fable, you feel that you’ve gained knowledge or insight. After hearing a parable, you have a vague unease that you should’ve gained knowledge or insight.

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I will NEVER understand women… especially the ones who only speak Chinese.

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What I like best about Nyquil is the having cold sleep and not is…

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I used to not take crap from anyone. Now, I don’t take crap from JUST anyone.

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One day, I’d like to punch a penguin in the face. I don’t dislike penguins. I just think that their reaction to being punched in the face would be adorable.

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If you try to achieve perfection, you will always be disappointed; however, if you accept that you are not perfect, then you will only disappoint your parents, family and everyone who cares about you.

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A woman is never truly happy unless she’s enjoying whatever situation she is presently in.

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I’ve found that, when looking at a friend’s newborn baby, there are appropriate things to say and there are inappropriate things to say. Apparently, โ€œkill it with fireโ€ falls into the latter category…

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19 thoughts on “Grandiose Thoughts that, in the End, Mean Nothing

  1. I have no idea why, but I laughed out loud at this one “One day, Iโ€™d like to punch a penguin in the face. I donโ€™t dislike penguins. I just think that their reaction to being punched in the face would be adorable.” Poor penguins! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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