
If I had to pick my one biggest mistake in my life, I’d have to pick the time that I opened an allergy clinic right next door to a Africanized bee, shrimp, peanut and ragweed emporium.
Older women who are attracted to younger men are called “cougars”. Older men who are attracted to younger women are called “all of them”.
Every man has his breaking point. Mine are my knees, elbows and wrists.
If we embraced communism, couples would no longer fight about money. They would, however, fight over whether or not anarcho-communism is an insurrectionary anarchism or simply a brief but essential transitory phase. Either way, SOMEONE is sleeping on the couch, tonight…
Despite all of their best efforts, veterinary scientists have yet to find an effective way to get a horse to gargle.
Today’s kids have video games, movies on demand and snack-sized foods. In my day, if we wanted to have fun, we’d run very fast down a grassy hill until we fell on our faces.
As my friends and relatives die, I cannot decide if I’m blessed to be alive or bad luck for my friends and relatives.
My brother and I bought fighting kites when I was a kid but we stored them in the same closet and they tore each other to pieces overnight.
I wouldn’t trade my boys for all the money in the world; but, I’d at least like someone to make that offer.
There are plenty of people alive today who like to yodel, which is ironic because so many of the rest of us really want them to die.
If the Sun were the size of a basketball, the Earth would be the size of an apple seed; but, don’t worry… that isn’t likely to happen…
I was yodeling the other day … they asked me to leave the supermarket. (PS – this is actually true)
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I didn’t take you for a yodeler, Deb. Hopefully, you’ve gotten the psychiatric help that you need…
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No, not traumatized enough yet by the rejections 😊
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Did you know that Jewel used to yodel as a child… on stage in her dad’s act…?
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Try playing the bagpipes. (The reason bagpipe players walk as they play is, they’re trying to get away from the noise.)
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That is funny!
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😊
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Proust is turning over in his grave right now (not at your post….it’s just a random thing). 🙂
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THAT’S the one I thought of last night and forgot!
“Marcel Proust is my favorite writer” are words seldom heard today outside of sanity hearings…
Seemed funnier when I was half unconscious…
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Falling on your face after running down a grassy hill is a perfectly delightful pastime. Can’t for the life of me understand why kids have given it up…
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Do you remember that? Running faster than your legs could handle? It was like a beta-test for your body…
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I do. And it was bloody marvelous. Kids today. Pfft! What do they know from fun?
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“all of them”, yodeling and the offer on your sons were my fav’s – fun read 🙂
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Thanks, Robyn. I wasn’t sure about the yodeling one…
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There is nothing – well, okay a few things – more annoying than a yodeler. Anything to get that sound to stop 🙂
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After what Deb told me (above), I’m reluctant to take a side on this one…
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😀 The couples fight was the best one.
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Thanks, Chelsea. I had a weaker one and actually came up with that one to replace it at three in the morning just before I published…
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Good thing you did!
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Here’s another vote for running on a grassy hill as an excellent pastime.
As for communism … The couple would no longer be fighting over money, but over the last scraps of food & medicine
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Loved the mental image of kids having “fun” in the old days. 😀
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